The Ballpark By The Bay

San Francisco figured out how. Build a brick-and-steel cathedral right on the water, give it the oddest field dimensions of any park in the country, serve steamed mussels and portobello mushrooms–and do it all without a handout from the taxpayers. That’s the new Pacific Bell Park, opening in San Francisco April 11. It’s enough to make you think the lords of baseball can actually do something right.

Except that name. PacBell Park’s already been dubbed “The Big Phone” by wags. If only the owners had prevailed with their first instinct, based on the team’s New York roots: the Polo Grounds. Ralph Lauren (get it?) loved the idea and offered a million dollars for “naming rights.” But the phone company ponied up $51 million more.